Another day...still feeling so blah. Actually a little more than blah, just sort of sad and lonely overall. I feel like I've been on the verge of tears for the past 3 days. Why? I do not know. I hate feeling like this. Maybe its just a phase, maybe its homesickness that I didn't realize I had. Maybe I've just got too much time on my hands to think about my life, and I've just started going crazy. Ugh, I'm getting emotional just sitting here typing this, and I'm not sure how to make it better.
Everytime I've felt a little depressed or lonely since I've been here, its been shortlived. I'll have dinner with someone, hang out with Andrew or just come to the office and talk with my coworkers, and I feel better. I've never been on the verge of tears at work, and obviously don't want to be. This would be easier if I could pinpoint what is wrong. I have lots of people who love me. I love lots of people I can call anytime I need to. I have even made a few friends here who I think would be there for me whenever I needed them. I've got Andrew, who is wonderful and who I love spending time with. I get it--I'm lucky. But that doesn't make it any easier when I'm going through days like the last few. Sigh.
I'm so looking forward to being in Raleigh tomorrow, I can't even describe it. I want to see my best friends, hang out with my parents, and pretend like I don't lead a totally separate adult life in another state for a few days. And then first thing Monday morning I'm jetting off again for work. At least I only have one more night by myself--I like keeping busy and having lots of people to have dinner with, even if it is my coworkers on a business trip! And by the time I get back from that, my friend Sarah is having a big cookout and Andrew will be back in town from his vacay. I don't like the fact I won't see him for almost 2 weeks, but he deserves a nice vacation, and I know it'll be a good miss for us:) I'll just be really happy to see him when we both get back into town.
Ugh, ok. Enough with the depressing post for now. Thanks for continuing to read, my dear friends, even when my blog is boring and sad and doesn't really say much at all. I appreciate you all so much and am lucky to have you interested in my life. Hopefully this mood will improve later!